Well, I dunno if this fits... but this amused me.

[gabriel-chaos.livejournal.com]

So. I finally managed to talk one of my friends into reading the Coldfire Trilogy, right? She isn't much into books or sci-fi or fantasy... But I got her to read it anyway. :D

And she's finished with the first book and she loves it. :D

In any case, while I was talking to her about the ending of the first book, these things (drabbles? conversation snippets?) kept popping up in my head.

I know the characterization is seriously off, and I know they're nowhere near as good as what you other guys write, since I don't do prose, but hey, this is how it went in my head.

This is an amateur effort, caused by serious amounts of caffeine and sugar.
I own nothing in this post, except the (consumed) caffeine that caused it and the mind that decided to randomly generate images.

...This post is probably good evidence that I should never be allowed to take sugar. My mind seems to be... hyper.



The scene opens to the ship that Gerald and Damien are traveling on.
Since leaving port, Damien seems to be in unusually good humor, which probably comes from being RIGHT about the Hunter coming along with him on the trip.
Gerald keeps LOOKING at him SUSPICIOUSLY.

"What are you looking at me like that for, Vryce?"

"Nothing." In the back of Damien's mind, he's rolling on the ground, laughing his ass off.

"...What's so funny?"

"Nothing." Damien is trying not to grin.

"Vryce...."

"....Excuse me!"

and here we see Damien fleeing to the other side of the ship to laugh in privacy.

-some time later during the journey.... The seas aren't so bad today, it seems-

"...Vryce. >.> What are you doing?"

"Nothing, your excellency!"

"...>.> " -suspicious glance goes here-

"...Why are you grinning at me like that?"

-offended Tarrant goes here-

"I'm just happy today."

"I'm sure." -BLATANT SARCASM-

"REALLY. " -sparkle sparkle-*

"...I am very disturbed, Vryce."

-a wide grin-

"....Stop grinning so... suspiciously, Vryce."

"Do I need a reason to grin, your excellency?"

"...ARGH."

"Do you have a problem, your excellency?"

"NO."

-a few minutes later-

"You used to call me bastard. Are you calling me "excellency" to mock me?"

",...You PREFER to be called 'bastard'?"

-a disturbed look-

"NO."

-the grin comes back-

"...I hate you, Vryce."

"The feeling is mutual. -pause- Bastard."

"...O.O"

"WHAT? You SAID you prefered it!"

"I said nothing of the sort!"

"Are you sure? I could've sworn I heard..."

">.> You heard nothing of the sort, Vryce. Your hearing must be failing you. -venomous insinuation- Perhaps due to old age?"

"....At least I'm not undead."

-INJURED DIGNITY STALKING OFF NOW THANKS- *

"....Hunter= 0, Church= 1000 points!"

"....Are you losing your MIND, Vryce?"

"Maybe because you keep SNEAKING UP ON ME, Hunter."

"What, you would prefer a ringing gong?"

"....>.> ...If I say yes, do you even HAVE a gong?"

"...I'm sure I can improvise, Vryce." -evil grin goes here-

"I hate you."

"The feeling's mutual."

-a day or so later-

"This ship's not big enough for the both of us."

"I'm sure we can make do. Do you have any chalk?"

"What do you want it for? Evil rituals? Virgin sacrifices? Graffitti?"

"Just give it to me, Vryce."

"...Fine."-hands over chalk-

-draws line here in middle of the ship-

O.o?!

"You stay there. I'll stay here."

"BUT THE TOILET IS ON THAT SIDE!"

"Deal with it, Reverend,"

"You don't even NEED to use the toilet!"

"But you do."

"....You're just mocking me, aren't you?"

"Whatever gave you THAT idea, Reverend?"

"...>.> Bastard."

"Your point would be?"

"...ARGH!"

-Damien stalks off here-

"Hunter, 1000. Priest= -1"

"IN YOUR DREAMS."

"... -creepy smile- In yours, maybe, Vryce~!"

"I wouldn't count on it, bastard."


and.. that's around where the random images stopped. Yes, I know the resulting images are not like the real characters. Bear in mind, these came about due to fragments and were written when I should have been asleep. Please do not maim me and I own nothing whatsoever worth suing for.

*
(okay, I know he doesn't sparkle in the book. Yes, I know it's not canon. It's my cracktastic mind and it's never been GOOD at writing things the way they should be.)

*
(Yes, I know Gerald wouldn't really stalk off. and all their reactions are probably off as well.It just... goes that way in my head. Needless to say I must be very disturbed to think in this delusional manner and should never be allowed to write fiction or fanfics. Ever.)

Comments

[etrangere.livejournal.com]

please could you use a lj-cut?

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

Sugar and caffeine can do that to people. Speaking from experience here...

And please, use a lj-cut. The only thing I can do as an admin is delete the entry, so you need to do this yourself. Simply enter <lj-cut text="TEXT"> at the place where you want the cut to begin, and replace TEXT by whatever you want the cut to say. The problem is that your entry is too long and messes up other people's friends pages.

[prettyarbitrary.livejournal.com]

-INJURED DIGNITY STALKING OFF NOW THANKS- *
*rolls around laughing*

Totally cracktastic. Totally funny!

Lj-cut goes like this: and then there's to close the part you want hidden. You can have a whole bunch of those in one post, if you want to divide them up.

[prettyarbitrary.livejournal.com]

*kicks the lj-cut*

(little carat-thing < ) lj-cut text="What you want the displayed link to say" (little carat-thing > )

and then to close,

(little carat-thing < ) /lj-cut (little carat-thing > )

@_@

[gabriel-chaos.livejournal.com]

Fixed it! I think.

Re: @_@

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

Yes, all working now. Thanks! :-)


"IN YOUR DREAMS."

"... -creepy smile- In yours, maybe, Vryce~!"

"I wouldn't count on it, bastard."

*snickers*