Beta-reader query

[winter]

Hello, everyone :) I'm new to Coldfire - I finished the Trilogy this Sunday and immediately started to write fic. Since I'm so new to the fandom, I'm not entirely confident about it.

Does anyone have the time to take a look at the first chapter (just over 6,000 words) of a post-Trilogy fic? I'd be looking primarily for comments on the accuracy of my characterisations (Gerald, Damien, Narilka and Andrys) and canon nitpicking, though any other constructive criticism will also be welcome. I'm not a native speaker, but I've been writing fanfiction in English in various fandoms for over 10 years and posting my stories online for almost five of them; people seem to like them, so I trust my writing's not too horrid.

Needless to say, if anyone can find the time to give my story a quick look-see, I'll be eternally grateful :)

Comments

[alice_montrose]

Lara warned me we had a new person on board! :D
Welcome, welcome! I'm Alice, the resident Romanian. (You will notice we are pretty much a Europe-based community, for some unexplainable reason.)

For canon-related stuff, I think it's safe to say mariem_1 is usually your best bet. My connection is fickle this afternoon and I have another Coldfire fic to finish the beta for, but I'd love to have a look at your stuff - depends on how soon you need it done. (There's ice skating to watch, after all, and the Dance competition has always been my favourite. That, and Gwendal-stalking. *snickers*)

Heh. I see you listen to tanz der Vampire as well. Nice musical, that one. *nod nod*

[winter]

Well, not much of a hurry, since I'm watching the ice skating as well ;) If you could take a look at my fic over the next few days, that'd be great - your LJ e-mail, I assume, and would a 81KB Word file be okay, or would you prefer .txt or zipped?

*makes note of another potential reader for her Tanz/Phantom crossover >:)*

[alice_montrose]

Fine by me, then! I seem to end up beta-ing more Coldfire fics as time passs. It would be strange, were I not enjoying it so much. Still, better get anotehr person to have a look at it as well. Two opinions are always better than one, and I'm biased where Gerald is concerned. *laughs*

Word file to LJ email address is fine - it forwards stuff to my Yahoo address anyway.

Crossover? Sounds very interesting indeed! ^_^ Let me know when it's ready!

[winter]

Mail sent :) And I'll let you know about the crossover, once I manage to convince Krolock that he doesn't need another impressionable teenager and Christine's better off un-vampirised...

[mariem-1.livejournal.com]

It's very flattering, Alice. *blushes*

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

If you want canon nitpicking, we have experts here. *grin* Check the discussion we had a while ago about Tarrant's hair colour, for example. Nothing is so obscure that nobody here will know it, and be able to give you quotes on it.

And - 6000 words and first chapter? *squee* Excuse me while I do some delighted dancing. ;-)

[winter]

I'll keep it in mind :) For now, I'm mostly looking for assurance that I haven't made too large blunders.

It's utterly, utterly atypical of me, but Gerald's just too bloody pushy. I have 500+ words of the second chapter, too. I'm hoping it'll end up with 3 chapters total, because otherwise my other vampiric muses and Count Dooku may stage a coup.

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

Well, if you want a second opinion in addition to Alice's, I'm offering. ;-)

And Gerald being pushy... he's just used to getting his way. The vampire muses and Dooku should be able to stand up to him, though. He managed to completely intimidate my elves.

[winter]

Watch it. This is still the first draft, but if you're willing to suffer my convoluted pre-editing style, I'll send it over ;) The Surreality e-mail's valid, I expect?

I think right now my muses are just stunned at how fast Gerald's making me write. This is Nanowrimo pace, and it's not November either...

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

Yes, that one redirects into my gmail address. And I'll suffer anything for fic. Though I can't imagine your style can be that convoluted. ;-)

Fresh fandom, fresh characters... when I got into Coldfire, I wrote more in one month than in the entire previous year. And it's all so completely untouched by fanfic still.

[winter]

Sent :)

I'm normally not like this with any fandom. Even Once Upon a Time in Mexico, which sucked me in like anything, I managed to produce this volume of fic in a month, not a week...

[carmentalis.livejournal.com]

Hm... not here yet. I got the file from Alice just now, though, so no problem. Did you use the lara@surreality.at address? Alternatively, alighiera AT gmail DOT com will always work.

Coldfire is just a bit more obsession-inducing than most, it seems. *g*

[winter]

Resent it to the gmail address just in case with my comments, but no idea why it didn't go through :/

[mariem-1.livejournal.com]

I will be happy to look at your story, but for canon-stuff only, since I'm not a native English speaker too.

[winter]

Looks like fewer people will notice my clumsy idioms then ;)

Thanks for the offer, but I think I'm good so far. I'm about to obtain e-texts of Coldfire, which will make research much easier, finally :)

[mariem-1.livejournal.com]

It's a pity, because I've caught a flu and I've been sitting home during the whole week without anything to do. It's booriing!

[winter]

Since you insist... your e-mail is? :)

(Providing you don't mind plotless things. Because so far it's mostly about Gerald being annoyed with people.)

[mariem-1.livejournal.com]

reiko1 AT km DOT ru
Darn, my Internet connection is bad today.

[winter]

Sent - hope a Word file's okay with you, otherwise I can resend in .txt.